Fall seven times and rise again, rise again and again until you get it right, like the Phoenix rising from the ashes – Life, Death & Rebirth.
Every time I fall I smile, I smile a wide smile with strength because I know that when I rise, I will rise like a Fierce Badass Gladiator on a mission.
Falling on my face or my ass has never been a WTF moment for me, it has always been more of a “I was on the wrong road” epiphany. Sure, I was delayed on arriving at the destination I had deemed important in that moment before the fall, but in my years of falling, I have been taught that the fall was a blessing in disguise, a sign that I had taken the road heavily traveled and that I needed to re-route and/or most likely than not, start over.
I have been re-routed from traveling the world to traveling towards a similar assignment that had five and a half years of my soul, and although my heart is filled with love and understanding towards the assignee, my spirit is rebelling. My spirit has been experiencing the many emotions of a caged bird. Bursts of anger, disappointment with my heart and tantrums due to feelings of entrapment. I am fury. I am peace. I am confused.
I rise every single morning that life is gifted to me and I am filled with gratitude for the new day and the new opportunities to live and learn and share and most importantly, to be of service.
I have risen up from the flames. I have tripped and dropped in different seasons for different reason and have learned different lessons that I have applied to my life. I do not care to continue falling but, if that is my destiny in learning life altering lessons then, falling on my ass it is.
The lesson that does continue to repeat itself in my many falls is LOVE, I cannot seem to submit myself fully without the feeling of losing myself. I have a passion for intellectual conversations and softness of the heart expressions and laughter, lots of laughter but then, I remember that with all the laughter come the tears, for my history of being in love has always caused me heartbreak. I wrote the piece below in 2007 as I was in a 7 year Love-less relationship with someone I had NO connection with – fucking self torture.
Magically Orgasmic 